#52WoG : The city you live in. #Kavya

If Bangalore is a stressed city and Mandya is an angered city, Mysore would be take a chill pill yaar city. People here are laid back and this attitude defines the city – Pensioners paradise. Forget bar culture, the only culture you will find here is agriculture. By 9:30 p.m. people finish their dinner and tuck themselves under blanket, it has been that and no one complains; one who complains makes a trip to Bangalore over the weekend. You can reach your destination within thirty mins time in this city, not because the place is small but because there is no traffic.  

During my engineering days I always dreamt of working in Bangalore, I loved the hustle bustle, the chaos and the traffic, but destiny had different plans and I landed up at Software Paradigms Infotech, no one in Mysore knew about the company then. Today, I am a known name in the organization. My take home was funny compared to what my friends had, but I let them laugh. I had no plans of working for a long time, but again destiny had different plans. Ireland just remained a dreamland and I married a guy who takes the city very seriously; so much that he cancels travel if it is more than a week. When there were issues related to “expanding” family, we made plans of shifting for better medical facilities, but behold - destiny again had different plans – Shelly and Missy arrived. Twins embraced me, I embraced mother and mother-in-law and they have embraced the city, long back.  

Thank you Mysore for the job that I love, that gives me recognition and nurtures my creativity like no other.  

Thank you Mysore for the man I am trying to love, who gives me huge hope as a father.  

Thank you Mysore for the twins I am learning ways to love, making sure I stay grounded with family and the city.        

#52WoG: Express Gratitude to 3 People #Sameer

Just 3 people? That was my first reaction when I read the subject for the week. Simply because there are many people I am thankful for, each one for a reason of their own. Some of them have been covered in my earlier posts as well. But since the title says 3, I am simply going to list the first three that come to my mind.

My mom – Now this one is pretty obvious. If there is someone to whom I owe my entire existence, that person is going to figure at the top of any damn list. Mom, I am thankful to you for all that you have given me, making my life easier, and all that you have not given me, teaching me how to be patient and wait to get my due. You are all that I could have wished for, and more. :)

Bunny – This is what I used to call my ex. The reason she finds a place here is because she was the first girl ever to tell me that she loved me and wanted to spend her life with me. More than anything else, she was the one who gave me the confidence that I was worth enough for someone to want to spend their life with. Though you are no longer a part of my life, you will always continue to hold a special place of your own in it.

My college friends – Yes, I am mentioning them as a bunch here because, they were collectively responsible for making the dreaded engineering college days one of the most cherished ones. We went through highs and lows together, the crushing defeats and the exhilarating joys. Those were the days when wide-eyed naivety mixed well with newfound cynicism and a persistent optimism. We all emerged a lot stronger and wiser, and I have you guys to thank for that.

#52WoG: A Friend (1) #Sameer

This is a rather difficult one. I had a tough time deciding which friend I wanted to write about. Not because I have a lot of them, but because I have very few of them, and they mean a lot to me for a variety of reasons. While someone has been with me since my childhood and has seen me go from what I was to what I am, someone crossed my paths in my formative years and knows me in a way that many others do not. Yet someone came to know me largely in a professional capacity and has grown to be a close friend over the years. It was indeed a tough choice and finally I decided to write about someone who has witnessed the most amount of change in me (as a person) over the years that she has known me. 

It is said that friendships forged during childhood usually turn out to be the strongest ones. I do not agree completely to this one, though I agree with it in principle. I think the amount of change in circumstances, personalities, situations that one sees over the period of the friendship is what tests and forges a friendship. And in this respect, there can hardly be any other person in my life more appropriate than the one I am going to talk about today – Arundhati, or Aru, as I (and many others) call her.

Next month (or maybe this one – I don’t remember exactly), it will be a decade since I have known Aru. I was newly introduced to the internet those days and used to do a lot of random blog-hopping. On one such afternoon, I came across her blog. Liking what I read, I left a comment (with a link to my blog, of course). She read mine, commented and we kept in touch via blogs for some time. After that, we moved on to chatting (Yahoo Messenger was HUGE those days, if anyone remembers) and then along came Orkut and Gmail/Google Talk. Admittedly, the earlier years of our friendship were nothing much to talk about. In fact, we used to talk only twice a year – once on her birthday, once on mine. :D I was also much more of a heavy duty philosophy fellow back then as compared to now. This wasn’t something she liked too much. :P We started talking more regularly after a fallout with a common friend and since then, we have not really looked back. She has ALWAYS been there whenever I needed someone to talk to, to offer (or not offer) her unique brand of advice, or just to hear all the crap that I can spout (philosophy dies hard, you see). I have tried to be there for her as well. We both have seen each other go through many ups and downs, and it has been an eventful journey so far.

I cannot begin to explain how thankful I am to have a friend like Aru, and I won’t. She knows, and that is enough for me. This is just to tell her (once again) what she means to me. However, I can definitely say that having her around has made life a lot more fun, and happy. As we complete a decade of this wonderful (and at times, blunderful) friendship, I have only this to say – Stay crazy, we already have enough sanity around. :)

#52WoG: The City You Live In #Sameer

Now this is something that is a no-brainer. Having lived in only one city all my life makes this easy for me. Mumbai (I have always called it Mumbai, no Bombay business for me) was, is and will always remain THE city for me. Being born in this city and having spent all my life here makes me very grateful for all that I have experienced so far. Now, one can write reams and reams about how this city is the best, or the worst, depending on how you look at it.

I can only speak about what this city has given me, the experiences that I have had here and what it means to me.  

First of all, this city is my birthplace. As someone who sticks to his roots and has absolutely no nomadic traits, it is natural that I am very attached to Mumbai. Simply put, I just don’t know any other city this closely to fall in love with. Not even my native place, which used to be my summer home every year, holds the same charm for me. Secondly, the people in this city make this city worthwhile. One may complain about the ever-increasing crowd and how the city is bursting on the seams under the load, but one can never deny the human spirit of this city. This is the country’s financial capital, but it is not drunk on money. You can see a super-rich skyscraper right next to a slum, and both are equally instrumental in making this city what it is. Thirdly, I love the freedom that this city gives me. Nobody really bothers you unless you bother them. Everybody generally minds their own business, until they need to poke their nose into yours. When you are stuck or struck by something, you can count on the Mumbaikars to try and help you out. They may not always succeed, but they will try. Numerous disasters have struck this city, and we all know how this city has rose back and tackled them. This is something that this city has taught me – to not make a fuss of tragedy and to get back to business. That is something I will always be thankful for.

And now for the most important reason I love this city for – the sea. I doubt if I will be able to love any other city like I love Mumbai. But if I do, it surely has to have a seafront. That is how much I love the sea. It has been a witness to many of my cherished moments – of both joy and grief, of companionship and loneliness, of love and longing. It is a fairly long travel from my place to Marine Drive, but once I reach there and see the evening sun dissolving into the horizon, it is worth the trip. Bonus points if I have a hand to hold when I watch the sun going down.

And yes, this is perhaps the only city where distance is measured in minutes and hours instead of miles and kilometers – a boon for a geographically challenged person like me. :D

#52WoG: Something Someone Gave You #Sameer

This was something that I thought would be easy to write about. After all, I have always been more on the giving side than on the receiving side of gifts. Or so I thought. Turns out, it is not like that. There is a lot that I have received from loved ones – many gifts, tangible as well as intangible. While some of them had an occasion tied to them (most commonly, my birthday), some were given just like that. And being the hoarder that I am when it comes to gifts, I still have each and every gift with me. Except for one, which I am going to write about today.

Just like the gift, the person who gave me the gift has also got lost in the sands of time (which have blown rather rapidly). The gift that I am talking about is a small teddy bear, given to me by my ex. Normally, one is not supposed to talk about such gifts for the fear of digging up painful memories. I, however find a smile on my lips when I remember Dubby as we used to call him. Rather than looking at it as a memoir of something that no longer exists, I prefer to look at it as a recollection of something beautiful that was. Now funnily, I was never supposed to have/get Dubby. It was on a random Saturday evening that I happened to notice this small teddy bear in a shop window. Stuffed toys were never (and still aren’t) my thing – I am a card/letter/note person. I told her that I liked it and want to buy it for her. “Oh that? No. That isn’t too great,” was her casual reply. After some time, I forgot about it. Next evening, she handed me over the very same teddy and said, “This is Dubby. Keep him with you whenever I am not there. He is my private detective and will keep a watch on you.”

After that, Dubby was a permanent fixture on my home desk. Even when she ceased to be a part of my life, Dubby was still there. Even with all the memories attached, Dubby never brought any grief to me. He just stood there and witnessed the ups and downs I went through. He watched me break down to pieces, and then rebuild myself again – with the same unrelenting, if artificial, smile. One day, when I was not home, one of my baby nieces took a liking to Dubby and mom gave it away to her. It was a couple of days before I realized that. I didn’t feel sad. I think Dubby had already completed his designated job of keeping an eye on me. It was time for him to move on to another assignment.

#52WoG: Something someone gave you #Kavya

There are two types of people – ones who believe in Valentine’s Day and who don’t; you were the one who didn’t even know there is a day for reserved love and I was dating you.  In seven years of togetherness, you never wanted to celebrate the day once.

It was not about “why have just one day for love” argument but you never agreed; there was no reason but it never happened. Initially I cribbed, then complained, later fought and finally gave up, and I always wondered how a celebration which was important to me did not hold any kind of significance in your life.

But the last year that we were together it happened, you gave me this!

After constant irking you told me why this day is about mourning to you, but yet got me the gift and a red rose.

I let go everything darls, hundreds of letters, movie tickets and keepsake bills, recently some of the dreams too but this is something I never could dispose or throw. Thank you for telling me “I was made for you”

At times when I feel helpless, it’s in my hand. Because “mere haath main tera haath ho.. saari jannathe …”

#52WoG : The City you live in.#Bhargavi

Just out of college and no where to go. Yes, literally nowhere to go.

I landed in Bangalore with a job at a lawyer’s office as an assitant counsel for a meagre pay of Rs.1000/- per month. The dust and the pollution was something I was not used to. There was a time when I thought Bangaore will always be a place where I earn my bread and nothing more than that.

But the thing is, Bangalore grew on me. Between growing in that office and migrating to a different job and then shifting back to law practice, Bangalore was not just the place which gave my livelihood, it became a home. A home away from home.

I am thankful to the city for giving me  a chance to survive on my own and yet did not overwhelm me. Bangalore made me feel like "I belong". I am grateful that the city is metropolitan yet has retained its cultural heritage intact. You could be dancing the night away pubbing one day and attending a Indian Classical music concert the next. Catch a hollywood flick, eat continental food and also watch theatre shows and hog at Darshinis. 

Bangalore gave me wings yet kept me rooted. Thank you Bangalore. You rock babeh.

#52WoG: A Family Member #Kavya

“You are mad to even think of watching a movie like that”, this is one of the most frequently heard one-liner in the conversations related to sandalwood.  I am not sure since when I am crazy about Kannada movies but I know the reason behind that. Every movie that I watched used to linger its effect for a minimum of 7 days during my preteen phase.  

It was not even about a particular hero or a fan frenzy thing; it was movies; not people associated with it.  After watching the movie “Hrudaya Haaditu” I wanted to have a hole in my heart, recollects mom. I know who transferred this obsession to me, my maama – my maternal uncle who is no more. He used to bunk work and take me for a movie, not just any random day but first day first show.  

There are tales of how maama always wanted me by his side during my summer vacations. He would come to my school the day I wrote my last paper of that year’s final exam, pick me in my uniform and reach native (thank god there was no concept of summer classes back then). He did not want me to waste a single day of my summer vacation at Mysore.  

He would make sure ajji made “gulab jamoons” by the time we reached home & together we would relish them after lunch.  One lovely chore that both of us loved to do was managing the audio cassettes. We numbered them alphabetically and the same numbers written against the movie names on a sheet of paper. He had close to 800 cassettes back then, too bad that we hardly use them now but I had no idea that day, today it will be reserved as a memory, as his memory.  

I need to thank him for showering his crazy passion of movies to me. Not because they work as entertainment today, but every time TV airs the movie we watched together I recollect the lovely moments we spent watching that movie with him. 

#52WoG : Something someone gave you #Arundhati

Z, we had been friends for almost ten years. I used to be your friend, your support and also your favourite person to pick on. The ten years comprised of laughter, fights, jokes, insane pranks and sharing everything about our lives. Discussing boyfriends, talking about family issues, etc. 

Things got bitter between us when finally I deciding to no longer be your friend. It hurt to be always ridiculed, taunted, insulted by you. I have never cut of relationships in my life. But this had to be done. Nothing or no one was able to put in some sense for you to understand that you were hurting your friends with your behaviour. Specially, your best friend. 

Though, we barely speak – an occasional ‘hi’ on whatsapp or sms to wish on birthdays and festivals; I have two gifts from you that I will cherish forever. A beautiful painting of Ganpati to adorn my bedroom wall when you were leaving India for good. It was a beautiful gesture from you specially because you believed in a different God, a different religion and said ‘I know this God brings you luck and success, so I got this specially for you.’ I still have tears rolling down my eyes when I revisit that memory. Not an idol worshipper, I still hold that painting closest to my heart. The second most beautiful gift which I have kept is a perfume bottle you had got me. Its been seven years, I use it sparingly when I miss you. Unfortunately, things will never be the same. But I am glad we have beautiful memories and anecdotes which always bring a smile on my face! 

Wish you love and happiness always, Z! As you would always say ‘Inshallah’ ... 

#52WoG : Something someone gave you #Bhargavi

I am a hoarder. 

Naturally, I have kept a lot of things people have given me over the years. Last year, I felt this need to de-clutter and wanted to throw (sounds too harsh to even say it) away stuff I had kept for so long. 

Easier said than done! Sigh.   

As always, I digress. The post is about something someone gave you and the first thought that flashed through my mind was not about things. Ideally speaking, those are what I am more grateful for.   

Never mind my transgressing mind, I will write about a thing. A thing that has long lost its utility value but is still very precious to me and I am emotionally attached to it.   

We had just started dating. This was 2006. I had recently started working and had no fancy cell phone. The good old Nokia 3310 was my mode of connecting with people. One day he saw me listening to the radio on my phone and asked, “You like listening to music?” I replied, “Yes, on the go. When I am commuting to and from work. But these radio stations play more ads than they play songs.” The conversation went on to other topics.   

He met me that weekend and there was this small gift box waiting for me. Inside the box, lay a Nokia Express Music series small little phone, white in colour and very handy to carry. I fell in love with the phone instantly. I was also very possessive about it. The phone fell, slipped, was thrown (at him, cos he would irritate me with his lame jokes at wrong time) and was abused by my thumbs. Gradually, the worn out phone died on me. But the dead body (with all its cracks from throwing it and missing the aim) still lies with me. Neatly packed in a Blue Gift Wrap. Many phones came and went but they aren't hoarded.   

It was precious to me because it was a gift from him. It was precious because he wanted me to have something better than what I previously owned. It was precious because, it showed his love and care.   

I believe I had said I love you many times.. but I had never said how grateful I was to have found love at that time. I will always be grateful for thing because it will remind me of some of the best times of my life and how I cherish those moments.   

(PS: I had written this days ago but was not too sure if I wanted to post this. Because, I wasn't liking how most of my posts for #52WoG was about him and the irony is that we aren't even together any more. After a lot of thinking, I concluded ..what the heck.. I am grateful for this so I will post this anyway)